Identity and Freedom
“It’s better to be alone than to bring the devil along,” as one Pastor says. Most singles would scoff at such an old-fashioned and overly-restricted principle of the single life. Indeed, what could be worse than being alone, we might ask? When you go through holidays, special events, or that dreaded family reunion without a partner, it feels like the skies are convening against you to make you feel miserable. There are no perks to being a wallflower, none. Even wallpaper has a wall to cling to. I would gladly take that role (roll), thank you very much.
In this “couple world” that we live in, where having a relationship or being married is an indication of a successful life, it is too easy to focus on what we don’t have. It is especially true when you get to a certain age and notice your social media newsfeed inundated with photos of weddings and babies and family life. By then, it is almost automatic that we turn the lens on ourselves and doubt if God’s purpose in our lives is still in progress. But is our identity only anchored in being in a relationship and finding God’s best?
Knowing our identity sets us on a path to freedom. When we are not defined by the world’s standards instead have the knowledge and understanding of who we are in Christ, we will not be subject to the pressure of the society that feeds off our need for relationships. We can enjoy the freedom that we have in waiting for the Lord.
Freedom from Distraction
When we are in a relationship, we tend to get distracted in the hopes of making our partner happy. Sadly our family, among other things, takes the backseat and goes down the ladder of our priorities. Let’s make the most of our single life by focusing on the things that truly matter. It is the time to get ready for our future and strive to be the best that God purposed us to be.
Freedom from Unnecessary Pain
To the world, being careful about who we surround ourselves with is confining. Carefully choosing a partner is something that we take lightly. They say, “Just follow your heart” or “Do what makes you happy.” But we always end up getting hurt, and we wonder why. Most of the time, we become villains of our own lives, and we fall victim to our crime over and over again. The Bible is clear that “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” — Jeremiah 17:9. During this waiting season, we can save ourselves unnecessary pain by abiding in Jesus and His word. We will soon realize that His guidance is all we’ll ever need to go through this journey as singles. Although there is still suffering, it is the kind of pain that will help us grow to become more and more like Him.
Freedom from Isolation
Being in a relationship tends to draw us away from people who can positively impact and influence our lives. It encloses us in a bubble, pushing people away. On the other hand, we can use this time wisely to cultivate relationships that would encourage us in our walk with the Lord. Our intimacy with Jesus will create in us a desire to be involved in a community. The kind that strengthens each other in this time of waiting and inspires us to be fruitful.
Freedom to Develop God’s Gifts and Pursue His Will
We have more time to devote to discovering our gifts when we are free from the burden of searching for or keeping a relationship. We can use these God-given gifts in such a way that would give honor and glory to God. Let us align our desires to His and witness the fruition of His purposes in our lives.
Freedom from Immorality and its Consequences
We are relational beings. That is why it is natural for us to crave human affection. A simple touch could warm a broken spirit. A hug can comfort a longing soul. But when we take these cravings within the context of an intimate relationship with the opposite sex, we become more susceptible to temptation. The Bible did not tell us to fight or power through these temptations. It commands us to flee. We must be cautious and seek the Lord’s guidance in maintaining purity in our bodies and in our minds to avoid irreparable consequences.
Embracing singleness
We see singleness as something to be avoided. We dismiss it as just a phase that everyone needs to outgrow quickly. What we don’t realize is that there is more advantage in choosing to be alone while waiting for God’s best than following the world’s path and reaping its consequence when it’s already too late. Only the kind of relationship rooted in Jesus Christ can give us the freedom to grow and bloom during this season of waiting. Only then can we become an effective witness to other singles within our spheres of influence. Teach and lead others into the knowledge of Christ and the acceptance of His freedom by abiding in Him and living the abundant life that He has planned for us.
Source: Five Freedoms, 4Ws, Teach, https://www.ccf.org.ph/resource
_______________________
Honey Lagorra
November 4, 2020